Rita..Rita....Rita.......
wtf mate?

honestly, what's up with that comment...

- Honestly, fighting back that comment with a post is exactly what they want, so I'll play into their little game for the moment, lord knows I can't walk away from a battle without throwing my iron fist around....

do you know me at all...because I certainly do NOT know you..so don't go making judgment calls here....anybody that's anybody who remotely knows me knows for a fact I NEVER get high on myself...I am seriously one of the most humble people possible...but every now and then I have a bit of pride and like to let it shine (like myself....get it, that was a joke..)

which in fact is too a joke..whenever I get high on myself everybody knows I'm not being serious...my rocking is understood and doesn't need to said..and since it isn't said, that is part of the reason as to why I rock...god here I go on myself again...

and who said I was "down in the gutter"......where in my ramblings does it say that..anywhere??? who's down in the gutter...if the gutter is having a great fucking time, laughing up a storm, throw a dance party ever Wednesday night....then we my dear have different definitions of "in the gutter"

and if I'm upset at other people doing wrong things...why can't I say it...I mean it's not right and I don't like it...where's the conflict with that? everybody fucks up...some more than others, but people don't learn lest you teach them, ie tell them what's wrong, right? whatever....everybody has a right to complain, especially when it comes to their personal space and their living quarters, no matter what the situation may be...get off yourself...

and another thing...when I posted my "Christmas Hate" post, it was still Christmas day..however when you posted your comment, it was no longer Christmas day...so I have no idea where you have nerve to bitch me out saying Christmas is over...it wasn't at the time of the post...I'm sorry my posts don't disappear after the day changes? I'm sorry, how am I at fault here?

and what if being "high on myself" was my Christmas present...what's that to you...does it interfere with your life..nope....it actually doesn't hit anybody's...and what, maybe makes me feel better for a split second...way to go ruining Christmas b...

you know...it's actually good to have some sort of pride every now and then...(talk about making the most, you don't know what is coming out of your fingers..)

holiday goggles? I'm everso confused......

see the world for what it really is..what is that? I mean obviously I have these "goggles" on which I don't know are a good thing or bad thing in my mind...you never specified..remember you were bitching at me for hating the holidays, but scorn me for wearing holiday glasses?

you get out of life what you put into it....total bullshit line, thanks Beatles, but no...."the love you make is equal to the love you take" yeah we all remember that line, it's a crock of bull, ask anyone who has ever loved...same analogy, same suckiness.... I mean it's partly true...but not absolute, there are no absolutes, so this is just someone's crackpipe philosophy...it's what a person who wants to feel better about themselves and their life choices to a person who has a more negative approach to life...sorry for me being influenced by Sartre..

I believe everything happens for a reason, there..that's my optimistic side...whether good or bad, it happens because it was supposed to, can't tell you why, but it just does..deal with it..that's all you can do right?

as for this magic bus you speak of....I'm not waiting for it (though it was a pretty kick ass show..and I believe it is still on TV in the morning because I watched an episode the other day...) and as for taking me back to that perfect place.."Jason-land"..well I'm there...my life is my life's reality bubble...I live everyday in Jason-Land, making the most out of every situation..I make it as perfect as can be (and perfect doesn't exist so deal with it...or try getting close)

you obviously do not know me, know my story, and just sound like a bitter old hag. I'M in Bloomington...I'm in my bubble, away from you "Rita", so quit trying to make your way in...everybody has their bubbles they live in too, so don't go trying to make a comment how I am blinded because I live in my bubble....everybody has theirs...some people's extend from 1st street to campus...nothing west of Walnut, nothing east of Jordan, nothing north of campus...anything outside that bubble scares them...it's an entirely different world.

and let me tell you this, that person lives the life he wants in that bubble, he makes the most of it, sure he has his down times...but who the fuck doesn't...next thing you're going to ask is why are people bitter....come on, get a fucking life man...the one question that actually has an answer....

and just to make things clear...my last post was about me not being supportive of Christmas, not taking part of it, whatever..I have my own beliefs and I was just making it clear to all those around me why I believe so (since I do get asked..)..it however, was NOT about me hating life or it's struggles, a pity call, a demand for better...just simply stating what I felt...I mean this is MY fucking journal is it not...do I not have the right to express my thoughts here?

And I still contend that the last post wasn't in ill will, rather I was happy..did you miss that in the first half...you know, where I texted everyone a Happy Christmas....are you jealous you didn't a card in the mail this year so you have to take it out on me? because YOU didn't get what you wanted for Christmas this year, or life for that matter, you feel the need to lash out at anybody possible, thinking this internet would suffice because what else are these journals and commentation system's used for, except by people who know the writer to some degree - they use it in good taste - but you deary, you are in the vast population who need to express how life has wronged them by taking it out on every little thing in people's journals...critiquing them to such a degree one may call it harassment, if this were in the real world and not the online world yes..so you got lucky there (here, whatever). Why don't you do society (both reality and virtually)((and yourself)) a favor, get some piano string, find a chair, and call it a day...we don't need your type with your pre-judgmental, verbally-violent, unconstructive telling me what's up with my life when it's actually you who has the problem negatism around, ok?

~keep your webpages fixed on Lowell's, not mine...

and as for telling me it's nearly 2005, thanks for the update Big Ben...I guess "actual" time doesn't exist in my "Jason-Land"...but really, what does 2005 have to do with anything...is/was something supposed to happen? Am I behind schedule with my "fake life"..I don't give a good fuck if it is 2025 and I was 42 (well maybe, I mean 42 is the answer...) I don't care where my life is or is heading...I'm having the time of my life not figuring it out...I'm doing something you're not and something you'll never be able to do...I fucking living life.

peace motha fucka!