Not a Song

free

dumb

Shit.just.got.real.

Sorry, I didn't write you a (love) song, but instead, you shall receive this media of emotion from me..maybe I'll write a sonnet, a haiku, or short story, but for now, this is my response.

Actually...I don't even have a response, I think I'm too outraged to even emulate a reply..however, this will be my riposte to that katy perry claptrap you call music.

**Just to give you an idea of how infuriated I am, I've, already, had to walk away and distract myself several times just to calm down.

And I know the classic line that I'm so vain I probably think that song is about me will fall from dull tongues - but when you know, you know...it's that sense, when you know you're being attacked..that sense when you know you're being talked at/to. Like when you're somewhere, anywhere there's people around, and though someone doesn't say your name, you know they are directing their words at you. It's not the, "hey you in the blue hoodie and Ray-bans" calling you out, it's more of a general "hey, blablabla".

And you almost freeze as you are doing whatever it may be; walking by, standing there, whatever, just thinking, wait, i don't know anyone here, surely that can't be towards me..yet you just know it is. This is one of those times, and though it may not be completely directed or 100% based from me, you can clearly hear my influence in the lyrics throughout the song.

It was proclaimed that despite my thinking my fast car will take me to freedom, i'm actually on a road to hell - if that were the case, I'd prefer a highway, and usually my fast car is fast enough to fly out of here, accompanied with a ticket or plan to anywhere.

And though you may think without your love all I have is a jail cell, well, let me correct you on that one..it's not without your love, because I'm pretty sure your love is what caused for whatever to happen, but mostly, your absolutely bat-shit craziness is what will give me that jail cell. It's not you falling out of love with me that does me harm, rather, it's you flipping a 180, turning your back, and making up horrible, malicious lies that will cage me in.

Ughhh, and there's more bullshit lines, but I just can't even justify a response to what sounds like some hollow, whiney little girl's attempt at revenge through music that was written by a 12 year old with the forced lines, stolen lyrics that sounded cool, and inaneness too unconvincing even for the pop world.

but don't take my word for it, you be the judge http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5KWKWW4kis

"sadly all those views are from my friends laughing at her..."

You

fucking

ruined

me

Sigh, that comment is directed to a number of people, including myself, so don't take it the wrong way. Ehh, I don't feel like going down that path right now, I'm still trying to catch up from this past week, what with the holiday and visitors and all. I guess I just wanted to get that statement out there, get it said. Funny, because almost every night as I lay in bed, right before I pass out I think of a title for my next blog - and they've pretty much all been something along the lines of one word phrases calling someone out on something.

It's sumer, and I don't write much in summer..I guess my mind goes on its own little vacation without me knowing it…maybe its just habitual now after all those years of schooling…may ending the year and the end of august kicking it back off.

I remember hating trying to get back into the grove of things in august..back on a sleep schedule, back on any schedule, back to making your head retain pointless knowledge all the while trying to remember everything you forgot in those few months off.

Maybe summer school would be good for kids..maybe year round school would be good for kids. Of all the archaic institutions in America, it seems silly to still let children off from school during the summer months to tend to the crops. Of course this type of thinking would only anger everyone…wonder why we are listed so low on the most intelligent nations list.

Right now everything in my life and around me is a mess…but not such a chaotic mess..more like that uncomfortable numb acceptance mess…like you're that sock in the washing machine that's just kinda sitting in the middle of things as the center blades churn back and forth. You're getting tugged and pulled in all directions, but it's not violent. You're kinda floating, not really getting sucked down into the mix of things..but you realize, even that would be better than where you are right now…because at least then you'd be doing something. you're just a sock in a washing machine, and nothing is living up to its purpose.

let's hope it's not a pink sock in the whites...

"to today, middle finger response"