You're Outta Here!

because you're a jerk...
..and so is that guy

The story of my ejection, yes, ejection

No, not ejaculation, there is no typo here, this is about my ejection from our football game on tuesday. Finally in five season I got my first ever ejection from a game, which also means I am suspended one game as well. Kinda harsh considering exactly what I, well we, were ejected for.

I knew my time would come, but I didn't think it'd be this season, heck, after the first two seasons I thought my time had passed, but apparently it did not. You see, as a player who is rushing the QB, for some reason there builds a riff between you and anyone that stands in your way...maybe not necessarily on the rushers part, I'll put blame on the other guy, naturally.

Inevitably when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object, some crazy shit is about to go down. Here you have a guy rushing from a distance of about five yards at full speed into a guy who's been set in his position since the team lined up..shit's gonna happen.

tonight, however, had a build up, be it a quick one, it also had a quick ending. The play prior is the starting point for this, and in a matter of that one minute, enough tension was build, tempers flared, and you got people getting tossed out by the refs.

So on the previous play the opposing teams QB ran with it, up the right of the field and everything started to bottleneck. One of my teammates while chasing after the QB, stumbled, slid, and fell into the quarterback from behind. Instantly the other QB starts bitching about being tackled so on and so forth..to the point where even the ref told him to be quiet. I of course defend my teammate, saying it was an accident, obviously, and just basically man up. My teammates do not throw intentional hits like that. So as he gets up, he starts talking shit to me..mentions something about tackle, to which i respond saying if he wanted to we could go outside and play tackle, I've got two guys on my team who went to college to play football...and all i ever hear from those two is why they cannot tackle in this league. He mistook my retort as some sort of wanting to start a fight, and continued to talk. By this point both teams were lining up and I could no longer hear him. I asked the QB if he was still talking shit..of course I could hear noise, just not make sense of it. Then I told him to get the dick out of his mouth and play some football...of course the ref was within earshot.

the following events are incredulous. Hike was shouted and I took off from my corner position running straight in between two wide receivers, who were coming at in full sprint - the fierocity in the nature of running like that through me off but i stayed my course, veering onto the left shoulder of the innermost receiver. As I passed him I gave him a "chip block" as it is known in the game, just a push or nudge to throw the other person off as you run your route. For me, i open-handed (this is key) pushed him with my left arm and made my move to the QB. As I approached, the center was already engaged with the other blitzer so I was on my way to the QB, or so I thought. I watched as he cocked back his arm, looking downfield, about ready to make a throw. At that moment i jumped in the air in hopes of at least tipping it, little did I know the QBs intent. The moment my jumped reached it's apex the QB turned and looked right at me flying through the air. He then hurled the pass right towards my midsection, luckily, i had enough of time/reflexes to stop the ball from hitting me in my most sensitive of areas.

As I landed and the whistles blew, a very discerning sense of unsportsmanship engulfed the field. I was just starting to call out the QB for the intentional ballpunch to my nuts when the receivers, whom i passed, were charging back to me. Their allegations went from me punching them as i passed to me throwing an elbow to god knows what. This moment is a blur to me and so it's hard for me to give an accurate depiction of what really occurred.

I remember my team running up and getting in between me and the other team, even though I was walking away, ready to get back into formation. I did stop at one point to turn to the team, but only because I was getting yelled at and I wanted to calmly address them, honestly! The other team were all over the refs yet again and that's when they decided to toss me and one of the other players. I really don't remember who it was, it wasn't the QB, i think it was the receiver i pushed on my way by, but who knows. The ref came over to me and told me i was gone, all i did was look at him and say ok.

As i made it back to our bench, starting to undress, the other team's person who also got ejected started to make his way over, opening his mouth, asking me if i wanted to still 'take it outside' Once again my teammates who were on the bench with me got up to get in between. Me, well, I could care less..I really didn't 'start' a fight, wasn't looking to fight, i just wanted to play.

I changed itno my street clothes and walked away from the bench and playing field. I preoccupied myself with a younger kid tossing a football to himself. He proved to be a good distraction as chatted it up playing catch. The one instance I turn back to see how the progression of the game was going, I see our big guy bullrushing their center. A warning was given to us and I was about ready to call the game at that point.

There's no sense in needless anger. It's a game, tempers will flare, I know this..I play to win! but when it comes down to it, we all have our own lives and real jobs we have to go back to in the morning. Had the main ref been near my bench when the bullrushing occurred, I would have told him to just end it, i don't care how close we are to pulling off a comeback, just end the game...it's not for fun anymore and somebody's gonna get hurt.

but that didn't happen, and things calmed down a little. We still ended up losing, i didn't shake hands as i wasn't allowed near the field, and i apologized to my team for letting them down by getting ejected for standing up for them.

I talked with refs and organizers after the game, then my team as a whole, escorted me to the parking lot. We function as a team; we all look good together, we all look bad together.

and my hand hurts like a mother....

"*in the parking lot looking at my hand* You know, if these marks here are teeth imprints..maybe i did hit him in the face..."

Something That Should Be Said

because nobody dares to question certain groups..
...because that would be racist/bigot/etc

something i posted the other day...


WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IS NOT MEANT AS ANY FORM OF DISRESPECT OR HATE...IN ALL ACTUALITY IT IS TO CAUSE AWARENESS IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION

That being said, please, do not comment if you're going to be a jerk.


I do not support the wearing purple thing that's going on today, not because it's about homosexuality, but because in a nutshell, it's ignorant. How many children get bullied every single day for various things: wearing glasses, eating glue, having a bad haircut - do you not think those kids don't commit suicide? End bullying altogether, not because some gay killed them self, but because bullying is bad in general. Care about the real fucking issue always, not when some minoritol group gets attacked..it's reverse discrimination when we start catering to people because they are different all the while neglecting everyone else..

but my point is this, when kids were getting bullied and committing suicide before, nobody gave two good fucks about anything...all of a sudden a homosexual commits suicide for being bullied and the world stops. So is the point we are trying to make is, ohh, i don't care if you get bullied or picked on for being different..unless that difference is your sexual preference (which, although is wrong, is still not a legal union in most of these states) We are trying to be sooo PC that we are really going backwards. It goes the same way for race. Example: White kid gets beat up by a black kid=whatever. Black kid gets beat up by white kid=hate crime...because we are putting these labels and causing these concerns we are only perpetuating the differences, the stereotypes, the hate.

I am not trying to be a dick about it, as my random bits thrown in would tell you how I feel about current legislation..but, I just feel it's very selfish on the gay community's behalf. The gay community has the month of June as gay pride month, usually (and intentionally) having the big parades on Father's Day - then they just had a day a couple of weeks ago, coming out day - to which i also made a comment about...

in a nutshell, there's no "i'm straight day" or "i like oranges day" - it's as though every bit of the gay community's life is being forced down our throats, to the extent and extreme as comparable to religious holidays

And sure, cyber-bullying is now largely popular..but again, where's the national awareness, the banners, T-shirts, or an anti-cyber-bullying day..again, there's not

Today is all about "anti-bullying gays" when it should be "anti-bullying" in general

picking people out of the crowd and singling them out, their issues, and trying to make us "all aware" only causes more problems..it's like saying, "don't press this red button"...somewhat. my point is, make this an anti bullying day instead of an anti bullying gays only day

if they want to be inclusive as a whole in society, they need to stop making groups/petitions/etc based on exclusivity. it's selfish to tack on the cause to every other little cause and call it your own.

Again, I in no way am trying to offend anyone with these comments, please understand that, I support you, but I also support causes that make sense while supporting the big picture without alienation or tacking on ulterior motives

my problem is within the community itself - it's like kids getting bullied is ok, but kids getting bullied deserves a special day...being straight and knowing it is fine, but coming out gets a day...soon it'll be like having cancer is ok, but being gay and having cancer gets a day or being gay and stubbing your toe gets a day.. i'm not trying to be a dick or cause more problems, i am trying to cause awareness that EVERYONE gets bullied and THAT needs to have it's day of support..without ulterior motives

Yes the gay community has a lot of hate thrown it's way by the government, the churches, etc but that movement to change all that is happening...now in fact. (Let me remind you that only 28 countries recognize Same Sex Unions.....out of 196. The US isn't the only pricks in the matter for all of those hating on the US..Lily Allen I'm looking in your direction....)

And the only mistreatment i see, is the fact that the LGBT movement keeps getting pushed down my throat "We're queer, we're here, we ain't going anywhere" i get it, i support it...but what i won't support is this media/holiday blitzkreig that has been going on. If there was a magic button I could press that would make people more ok with the LGBT community, make same sex unions legal, and make all this LGBT propaganda go away, I would push it in a heart beat. Everyone has problems, everyone has issues no matter what kind of person they are...women had to fight for rights, blacks had to fight for rights, and now the LGBT community has to fight for rights..i get that..i'm just really sick of the selfish propaganda as much as they're probably sick of the hate..the street goes both ways my dear...I'ma let you do your thing, just don't get in my face about it...

ever wonder why people hates the Jehova's witnesses...same principal.

To conclude, the recent suicides made national attention and brought awareness of kids being bullied. If everyone in every community would have seen this as an opportunity to end all bullying that would have been great. We could have had the "Anti-Bullying Day" and still worn purple in memory of the homosexuals who lost their lives that made us all aware of the extremes that is bullying. But wen you go an ad one little word into that day, it changes everything.

What happened with those kids sucks, what happens with ALL kids being bullied sucks. Instead of addressing the BIG picture of bullying as a whole, the gay community kept it an exclusive thing, and what I'm saying is I don't think that's right or fair. It's not fair to everyone else being bullied. Plenty of kids go through their lives, mainly in school, getting called names for things they have no control over. So what if they have glasses or red hair or whatever. the point is people are people, in the end we are all the same .

Bullying is wrong, domestic abuse is wrong, discrimination in all forms is wrong...

End the Hate.








"It's an objective observation, and I'm sorry that I wasn't swallowed up in the propaganda and wanted to stand for ALL equality and against bullying on EVERYONE."

We Talkin' bout Practice

warm me up,
put me in

I need to get back into the groove..

No, that's not a "that's what she said" joke, i honestly need to get back in the groove of writing again...and of course the only way to do that is to, well, actually do it. So these (re)start-me-up blog posts I'm making, although yes get published as finished works, they are the practice writings til i actually get better, if ever..

that being said, my football team had practice today - let me point out that every day the team meets up, we have a different group of 11 guys show up - i feel as if i'm making some sort of matrix to see just how many different variations of groupings we can have..so far, it's annoying.

I won't bore you with the details of the team (at the moment), i'll be brief and say practice went well, let's see what happens in the game next week. I suppose the real part of why I mentioned practice is because of what happened at the end of it. As we were finishing our last play a random kid walked over to ask if he could play - and when i say kid, he had to be like 12? I'm horrible with ages. Anyways, everybody had something to say about this kid wanting to play, and after tossing the ball around a couple of times, he waived over his other friends, who naturally kept a safe distance away.

they joined and wanted to play as well, again everyone on the team had something to say, whether it was a groan or an ok, there was not going to be an agreement met. One player asked me, "yo coach, how do you feel about having these kids play with us?" I was welcomed to the idea of utilizing the kids as a pass rush, but knew as i said it, others wouldn't be ok with it...

so the balls were tossed around, some stayed, if briefly and played, others ended the practice and walked off - but the point i'm trying to get at was this. within the group of four boys was one girl. She was adamant about how she could catch a football (and she could), throw a football (and for a 12? year old she could), and how she wanted to play..tackle.

Now I know the term "tomboy" comes to mind, however...there was something different that would overpower the tomboy term i would come to find quickly. What was so odd was her realization of self. now it may be true that i do not have a lot of experience with kids, well, it is true - no siblings, no real deep family with cousins and all that jazz (that i ever met) so i just don't know what it's like to be around kids. I typically think they are all innocent and stupid to be honest.

I think other than this time (and that time three weeks ago at the IU tailgate where I drunkenly played catch with some random kid) i can't recall the last time i was around little kids. for some reason i see this as fucking with me as i am a parent later in life.

I tried then, and pretty much the rest of my day, to remember what it was like to be in 6th/7th grade, being 12, what thoughts were going through my head. This only caused me to drift into a surreal like state.

Ughh, I keep drifting in and out of thought here on this..and you all know how i hate to have my attention diverted for more than a second while writing. I feel utterly and completely exhausted, and i don't know exactly why. So instead of doing my homework that is due in an hour i decided it would be in my best interest to write...followed by me going to bed

though i just want to stay awake, fight the tired, stop dreaming.










"Soooo, it's 5am and i'm wide awake, but about to get in bed...yet, for others, they are just getting out..strange world i live in.."

It's Been a Minute..

Well, more than that
many minutes in fact..

and i don't know how many I got left in me...

I've been feeling...creative isn't the word i'm looking for...it's an ansty, irritable, cannot focus kind of feeling. I've toyed with the ideas for short clips, writings, quotes, etc - and while I've actually made some of those things, i haven't done much with them. The most you get from me is a 140 character update via my twitter..maybe a status on facebook for something that really needs to be said, or a nonsensical rant with a picture explaining nothing from my dailybooth. As i did all three of those things today, the shorter only manifesting into the larger i realized...that i just needed to fucking sit down and write it out, old school style.

I've been watching Netflix religiously, mainly TV series because of their length...rather, their shortness. I feel a pick-me-up, break, or food feast is equivilant of the time it would take to watch one episode. So far i made it through six seasons of The Office, the first of Archer, and my most recent (and reason why I am writing this) Californication.

I stumbled across this show awhile back, but never made my move on it - it was on showtime and who the hell watches showtime, i thought all the good series shows were on HBO. Anyways, all that is available on demand is the first season, and that's all i watch - this mailing discs back shit is for the birds. Let me just add in, i love my netflix, and I only got it because its an iphone app..so i watch on my iphone, my lappy, and off of my PS3..life is grand

I continue, Californication is a show....that I'm not going to bother you with the synopsis of, long story short, it has made me want to start writing again. And as much as i know that i'm not talented enough to be published other for than that button in the bottom left hand corner, i enjoy it. While most of it is rubbish, i can always look back on my previous posts and claim brilliance. I know I'm not the next great american novelist, i've come to terms with that rather easily, and though my fan base is small in numbers, they care, which makes me care.

That being said I've neglected the people most important to me for far too long. I need to give to them what they want, what they need. This. Me hunting and pecking away at 4am on some random Wedne-Thursday morning. Typing away because i can't sleep. typing away because i think this will help. Typing away because i think someone gives a shit. Typing away like it matters. Typing away as if I am a sole survior in the universe, yet that universe relies on me.

We reap what we sow, we also write what we know...and the latter is what scares me most.










"Well, I don't know, but I've been told
You never slow down, you never grow old
I'm tired of screwin' up, tired of going down
Tired of myself, tired of this town

Oh, my my, oh, hell yes
Honey, put on that party dress
Buy me a drink, sing me a song
Take me as I come 'cause I can't stay long"