If Only I Knew...
I wouldn't be making these decisions..

once again I am gone...

I hate change, probably moreso then the next guy, but it seems the last part of my life has been filled with all these changes, from places to who I am....this uncertainty is gonna be the death of me..

if only I knew some the answers, or was actually able to describe the way I feel about things, put an understanding to them, be able to categorize them, we might have a different situation...

everything is up in the air and even though I hate it, I know I will enjoy where I am, because no matter where I go I will always have some adventure...

So you all in a month..after that...I do not know













"Every passing second is a chance to turn it all around.."

A Mother of All Days...
what else would you expect?

tomorrow arrives sooner as each day ends quicker

So apparently the OG opens it's doors a half hour earlier than normal for this mother's day thing...amazing..so that meant I had to be at work at 1015, as did everyone else for the most part. Yeah it sucked getting up at a different time, it seems as if every morning shift I have had in the past month, at least, even shifts I picked up for others, always..always started at 1130..it was a rotation I could live with.

The morning sucked, lots and lots of parties..but Fabi and I got to work together on some tables together, us both being in Ecco..he was happy to be able to work side by side with me on my last hours at the OG - and since he does not work tomorrow, I would not being seeing him again..

but it seems as if we can't have any flawless days, can't go without making Jason flip out about something....so here's the deal - they sit an eleven top for Fabi and myself...well only five are there....so we wait and wait..meanwhile I have no other tables...then all of a sudden they double seat me...and of course, the rest of the party shows up as well...meanwhile the time has approached 4:00, which meant any day server was now cut and all replacements were on for this particular day...well my section moved to the exact opposite end of the restaurant..just like it did the other night..so I told the hosts please be aware of this, I have three tables in Ecco, do not seat me....so time passes and I saw one of my tables, 202 ironically enough, was set up for five with menus and everything...so I went to the hosts to ask about, they begged me to take it, telling me the party was over their quote time..I felt bad so I told the hosts they could seat the group, but please do not, do not give me any more tables than that....

so while that is going on, my other tables are being needy as fuck...and every salad I bring out to 531 has dressing in it...well as I go to check back on my table at 202, I notice 222 was sat, and I lost it...in a flash I was up at the host stand freaking out about it..I took the table, but I wanted to voice my opinion on the lack of communication and/or ignorance on their part...and after I greeted the table a couple hosts were standing near the wine hutch and I literally threaten to bludgeon the one host who sat me to death with the wine bottle I had in my hand..amazing (and some say they can't see me killing anyone...heat of the moment counts does it not?)

after that it was pretty much clear sailing....my tickets were all above fifty bucks which made me happy, tables were pleased with my service, and I wrapped up the night not only giving my close away to Kmart, but walking out with 135..not very good, but that was about average - nobody came out a winner today.

As I was closing up shop, getting my last tables to leave I was trying to figure out who worked tomorrow morning and who did not..those who weren't working I said my goodbyes to, and it didn't get emotional until I talked to Enrique...I asked him if he worked, he told me no so I told him goodbye for good..and he looked at me in that "he's speaking English" sort of way..and then once I explained to him that I was gone for good, he gave me the saddest look possible, and that's when the levees broke..how could I not tear up at the sad little teddy bear man whom I've come to know and love over the past two years...after that saying goodbye to people was a little difficult...it was a mess to have so many people in a public setting see me crying in sorts...

but my favorite part of the day was when my very first table asked me if I had told my mother Happy Mother's Day, or if I was going to, to which I told them my mother passed away..I'm such a horrible person...

I went home, feeling oh so dirty and therefore decided on showering..well what I intended to be a quick shower turned out to be a whole ordeal, what with the shaving and shampooing...I got dressed and embarked out looking for the lake they call lemon....

I drove and drove...turned around several times...the sun fell fast and the roads were harder to see, especially in this uncharted territory I was in...I would eventually find the roads I needed to go, crossed over a road with the lake on both sides of me, almost causing a panic attack, but found where I thought Crystal's party was at much much earlier....well the sign said the gates would lock at sunset, and this was well past it, so I made my way back through the fog all the way home...

once home I called my grandmother and my other mother, Mrs. Baiel - we talked briefly, just catching up, making sure everyone was doing ok - just me trying to extended to them what significance they make in my life..it was funny because Mrs. Baiel did not recognize my voice on the phone, and when asked who was calling I said Jason..still no idea..and so there I sat dumbfounded and at a loss for I tried to call and do a good thing and it wasn't working out at all...but then I snapped out of my pity and exclaimed, "my name is Angus" realizing then that my mentioning of my last name was the only way to be remembered. after that was said it was all good and of course she knew who I was...

coincidentally enough Zach ended up calling me later...we had a nice talk about things and I truly miss having him around..he has such a brilliant mind and I hate distance for f'ing us because we truly do need to be together, before we get old and can't do nearly half the shit we can/might get away with now..

pretty much just killed some time, talked to Amber - she hated me for a name I called her (MB), got a sad voicemail about a bunny, then 1am came around and so did Lauren..we had decided on watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, a brilliant film might I say..she had never seen it and made a mention of wanting to see it the other day when she was over, so now was the time, and the place was mine as well...which I will state for the record was an interesting conversation..

we watched the movie, only having to restart it once, and that was when we were only five minutes into because we got distracted by imdb...right off the bat Lauren liked the movie..which was weird because she hadn't even made it into the opening credits before coming to this conclusion...but she has remarkable judgment and calls them like they are..in the end she was pleased with the movie, although the ending for her was lacking, she wasn't a fan of it, but when questioned what she would have liked, she really didn't know...

after the movie we watched an informercial about some incredible electronic knife thing...which lead into us playing Loser..which lead into her looking through my albums and us talking about music..and then she realized what time it was and went home...

so as awake as I was at 530 in the morning, I stayed up only a bit longer, maybe to type this up, and went to bed..I had a big day ahead of me tomorrow...













"You know Hitler would be rolling in his grave if he wasn't alive and well somewhere in Argentina.."

Was it Really Friday?


So the entire day was a wild one, and I'm starting to wonder what's up

So I woke up having a nice five hour nap, if you can call it that....four to five hours is pretty much the teetering point of calling it a nap and an actual amounts worth of real rest. As i am getting ready for work i get a phone call from some random 812 number, so i reluctantly answer, it's Mira, my salon..they were wondering if i still planned on coming in for my hair appointment. WTF? So i argue with them because i was told Saturday morning, i remember the confussion, because the girl as she closing the conversation said something about Friday and i corrected her, and she agreed and say, "oh you're right, Saturday"....so now i'm pissed, they ask me to come in right then, i told them i was going to work that's why saturday was better...whatever, I've had the same girl cut my hair for well over a year and this is how i get treated, fuckers

So I went to work and did my standard crap there...and right off the bat i was upset, i was on the family table, the only section in the restaurant that wil piss me off....so i just ignore it and i great my table...then within minutes the hosts are pissing me off...the person in the family table section with me was due in fifteen minutes after me...and they are seating their section to have me pick them up..then when the other person does come in they give her a seven top at the family table, which usually gets to me, but this time i sent me over the edge because the party going to that table consisted of Asa and his friends, so that tip would have been good..i remembering going up to the host stand and telling them to "fuck off and die, just fuck off and die" and there was the last of my acknowledgment of the host staff....

So i eventuially get off of work, make my way home and am extremly tired...K-mart wanted to hang out sand i told her she could come overto keep me warm bacause i was gonna lay down on my couch, watch TV, and pass out....well she never came over, and pass out i did, ignoring all alarms and even silencing the TV...when i awoke it was 530, and i was supposed to pick up a shift for jeremy that statrted at 5..nice...

so i roll into thre OG at 6, sleep lines all over my face, and i just play it off...well because i was late they moved me out of the section i was supposed to be in and moved me into two-top hell...whatever, i didn't care..but i made the most of it, there was another just as bad section, the one in the back corner of Ecco, that was also up for grabs...so i told the hosts, let's play a game, keep Jason full by seating him all the two tops, not only for his section, but thw two two-tops in the back corner...so there i was, rocking five two tops all night long...the new host Ashley who was seating me, with the help of Kathleen, did an amazing job, i told her i wanted her to have my babies...she kept me so full at one point i was quadruple sat..

then the freak out part came...so i get cut, but Chase wants me to close for him, and since i missed the dorr being open i told him if he got me a smoke break i would close for him - shocked at what her heard, he made it happen..well eventually...the hosts realized i wasn't cut anymore and they basically triple sat me when i already had one table..so as i am getting them all straightened out, they seat Chase's section..and nobody knows who has it..so i ended up taking my fifth table, and having to run on total opposite ends of the restuarant, complete and opposiute ends...

so just as i needed everything right then and there, it all crashes on me...several of my tables food is coming up, people are wanting to switch beverages, more breadsticks are wanted, and of course they are burning in the oven..so i am freaking out, trying to get everytihng together..and i needed a boat of alfredo...i called for that things like five time before i finally walked up to the line and requested it..and there i saw Ian smiling, slowly putting on his gloves...and i am calling for it, calling for it, becoming more and more impatient, pleading to him with my situation..then i lose it, i call for it and throw the tray that was parked in front of my across the alley, then i walk away and go check on 202, when i get there i find out that someone has taken their order because they had been sitting there awhile since i last had been there...so i make my way to the back and chase meets up with me, hands me the paper that Cassidy tok the order on..and i was so in a frenzy that i couldn't ready it, and she walked past and itold her i'm sorry but i can't read this..she has fine handwriting but i was probably to the point i saw red, ok, maybe not that extreme, but writen words excaped me...

all in all it worked out just fine..i closed, but Doug cut me at quarter til 11 because i no longer had tables..i stayed and chatted it up with TJ who was behind the bar...then our conversation got interupted by Chantel who came back to help TJ, so i peaced out..i made my way home and as soon as i walked in the door i had a gin&tonic in my hand...as promised i called Lauren, only to let her know i was drinking alone and to expect a drunk dial later...so i picked out a movie, Lost in Translation, and made a seat on the couch...i didn't make it thirty minutes into the movie before i started recieving texts and calls from people all over.i had originally started to make plans for Kmart to come over, but as soon as other people called i had to stop and figure out what was going on...i talked with Amber for a majority of it all, she even kept me company as i walked over to Nick's to meet up with Lauren.

yeah yeah, while amber was talking to me, Lauren was texting me, "trying" to get me to come out to nick's with her...so i arrived, got another G&T from the bar and bought Lauren a Heinekin, she was drinking beer tonight and wasn't about to switch over to liquer. We were only there for a bit longer before someone decided to go over to Sports...so we made the looooong walk on over to Sports (now that in my mind would be a crawl) Brandy almost was denied access, but we did make our way in...as soon as we walked in i saw RockMyWorldRachel and Emily from Tumbleweed..later i found out TabtheBlonde was working and i met up with her later...

So i made my way back over to the girls and Brandy handed me a G&T, making me very happy....we went out onto the patio and sat around, me freezing, but there we sat...we were there long enough for us to finish our drinksand we were back on the walk...we were going to someone's house, i forget the name, but Lauren is always over there..so we walked, and i pointed out the fact that we keep getting further and further away from my house, and i walked to the bars....

we got to the house, located on 12th and Lincoln, i remember making a text to Kmart asking here where she lived because i swore it was nearby, but i never recieved a reply. we hung out there for a long time, well longer than we were at any of the bars for...Lauren and i talked some more, she made the comment on how we had switched roles, she was the talkative one now and i was more to myself..she didn't think i was having fun, but i told her it was a change of sceneery, and as a conservative republican i am not a fan of change, so i would have to warm up to it all, i was just people watching in the mean time... which brings to my next point...Lauren has been the only person in my experince to actual pin me as a republican just from a look, and maybe a conversation at work or two...it seems as if everyone else around me has this common misconception that i am some sort of crazed liberal...whatevs...

whatever, the night grew on and Lauren knew she needed to get some rest, she actually had to work in the morning..so round 4 her and i left, she was gonna give me a ride back to my place..so we walked to her car over by yogi's and she drove me in her little red cougar back to my place..and as i was giving hre the directions she started to freak out a bit..apparently she is always over where i live, he boyrfriend was staying with this guy named Nick, and Nick is the guy who drives that frickin' Scion Van that's always parked in front of the place..so we sat there and talked, being wierded out by how small of a world it really is...and now that i thought about it, i do remember seeing that little red cougar in front of my place, it only stood out because there are only three red cars that ever park out in front of my building, and they all have some sort of significance to me...

so we sat there talking and Lauren finally asks, "well, do you want me to park somewhere and come in?" so we did just that

I woke up well before any of my alarms went off, but that didn't mean i wanted to actually get up out of bed..a thousand things to do, and yet here i lay...i did make it to work, at 1130 for a shift i picked up for Darrell...things weren't bad and i still made forty dollars, so no complaints really...

So on my break I went over to BDubs trying to have lunch yet again with Crystal..well as i got there she was already out of uniform but was having lunch with one of her designer friends, and so i joined them. The funny part about it all was as i walked into the restaurant "Somebody Told Me" was playing, and i thought to myself, "again really wow..." and at that moment while Cystal was in the back she heard the song and she had the thought of, "I wonder if Jason is coming or not.." and seconds later there i was..weird...

Lunch was good, i got to play the trivia game versus nobody, and I won! I didn't get a lunch discounted hookup, i missed it by a minute apparently, but Crystal still got me a drink and some wedges..we talked, it was good, and she was trying to get me to buy her car..I can see myself in a yellow convertible Mustang......

After lunch I spent the better part of an hour trying to find a store that sold Exotic Blend Camels...let me save you the trouble and say I only found one place, it was next to the OG, but they didn't have a very good selection, only three flavors to choose from, but apparently they are getting Mandarin Mint tomorrow, so it's all good...

Back at work I made a flyer about the party tonight...remember from the other night, Crazy Horse, phone droppage...yeah, that party...so everyone now thinks TJ is having as party at his place - I texted him to let him know, and from that point on ew had to lie to everyone who asked..and you know me, i could not keep a straight face, and i just laughed when Char was asking about it...amazing how retarded yet funny this will be...

but TJ is a horrible liar and people soon found out it wasn't at his place, but yet that there was a party still going on..the night turned to sucky when Fabian came up to me and trold me i was going to be doing a reverse follow..awesome, and i wanted to make money tonight..

So i followed around this douche rocket who sucks at life, or serving rather, that's all i know him as of yet...he's nervous, he's shaking, he's got tunnel vision, and he's not smart....there was a time at the bar he put a drink on his tray, tried and tried to lift it up, and as he got it to his shoulder i remember asking someone to follow me with a broom and a dustpan because i knew he was gonna drop the tray..and right after i barely got those words out he's walking away and the tray is leaning..and soon the glasses start to fall over and i run and and swipe the try from him and throw it onto my shouler pushing the glasses back upright...amazing.

i'm not gonna lie, the hosty

Work was a blast...wait, you can't detect sarcasm with this movable type here...but if you know me, then you would have picked up on that already, so F off and die (theme of the month now)..yeah, I worked with two certain somebody's who shall remain nameless..awkward yes, especially when you accidentally make eye contact with each other and then regret it for the rest of the day, wanting to rip your eyes out and step on them while pissing all over the walls...graphic much?

Anyways, the creepy part of the day was prior to work, i was on my way out to my car, shuffling through my keys as i left the apartment, and i stop dead in my tracks....my apartment key has found its way back on to my key ring...now i know what you are thinking, "Jason, a key is a key, and I've seen your key ring, you gots lots of keys, how you would ever notice if one was missing or put onto it" Vaild point, but if you have ever seen my apartment key you would not be making such statements, it stands out like a sore thumb, so when it's there, you notice it...whatever

so it made it's way on my ring, how it got there or when it got there i am not too concerned about, creepy, but whatever, what gets me is the fact that the party who had possession of the key is as much wanting to avoid me as i am avoiding everyone else...wow, can't face up to your own injustices so you have to hide yourself..who's the bad guy now???

Work eventually wrapped up and i made my way over to Buffalo Wild Wings in hopes of having Crystal serve me my lunch like we had planned on. As i walk into the place i see Crystal and she's happy to see me, but as i approach her i can tell she is getting ready to check out, so no lunch today, but we stand there and talk..then she gets the idea to take me in the back to have her help her with her sidework..i'm a glutton for punishment, especially when it comes to ladies...so with the manager's ok we went back there and made two ounce salsa dishes, a crap load of them...everyone who walked by had no idea what was going on, why was there a guy, in an olive garden uniform minus the nametag, in the back of the kitchen..yeah, since Crystal has been there since the store opened and they love her, she gets away with everything, including making her own schedule...

So after all that was finished i waited for her back up front, when she came back she had a flashy button for me and a togo box with wedges, boneles chicken, and a togo cup..it was amazing..i have such an intricate system with all these people i know...networks man,m that's what it is all about...i wonder if this is a profession.....

after work i went home and took a nap, when i awoke i found out they were having a Top Chef marathon and began watching that...shortly after










"We're just sitting around, drinking some ........."

Not Going Out with a Bang....
..less it's a gun to my head...

So long story short, work sucked.

My day started off early, somewhere around the time my alarms went off, ten am for some reason. I eventually got up only because I remembered I left a body out in the living room, whether or not it would be there would be to my surprise. Andrea was still there, she was just waking up as well. I didn't have anything to say, and wasn't really expecting to see her in the morning, so she kinda through my day for a loop...so all I ended up doing was getting ready for work and heading out.

I only had two tables, and one of those was an eight top which was supposed to be just mine but Tara butted her way into it, as she did with my last eight top...she is really getting on my nerves about this, but whatever, one more week til everyone can peace out.

I was out the door by one and back home...just as I started to settle down I ended up passing out again. I would wake up randomly being startled at the fact I was sleeping and wondering what time it was, worrying if I was late for work somehow..well I eventually got up very reluctantly and made my way down third.

I arrived at the OG and the place was as dead as heaven on a Saturday night. I told the hosts that if by chance they ever sat me to find me in the alley to inform me of such an act because I would be dicking around in the back or cleaning or something, and that I would not be on the floor to check, ever. In part it was to keep myself occupied, there really wasn't anyone to talk to, and I didn't feel like standing around, so I cleaned and organized the alley, and then everyone thought I was expoing, amazing, but it was also just as much to avoid certain people. as I cleaned I threw out the line, "if you got time to lean, you got time to fuck off and die", which actually got Drapper to do a little work..every little bit helps...

so then it's quarter to six and the new Amy chick comes in asks who has 502 because they had been sitting there for a long time...I flip out, throw my broom across the alley and storm out to the host stand ready to get blood stains on my uniform. as I get up there they hand me my goal card, I didn't get a chance to curse anyone out, just grabbed the blue piece of freedom and turned around..went back into the alley where Amy was telling me she got their drink orders, I told her "good, cuz they are yours", as I held up my card. I checked out and peaced out.

I got back home and got ready for margaritas later, blogged, called people, whatevs - but I just find it funny that I am still having to break into my house because someone won't call me or return my house key..whatever. Then some bad news was relayed to me, and margaritas were postponed..which eventually turned out not to happen at all - which was probably for the better because later I was told by RockMyWorld that Tumbleweed ran out of the Margarita mix..how lame

Anyways, 10 rolled around and I drove the minute over to Bear's Place to meet up with Darrell and TJ...Darrel and I got in, for free mind you because we are rockstars, and ther place was packed - had no idea from the parking lot though...so as we made our way down to the front we noticed some shady business with purses on the tables in the front, our tables..then as I am staring at this business I feel a tug on my pant leg and I look to see frickin' Kelly Q. we start talking and then I ask her if she knows what the deal with the purses is, apparently it's her friends...and then she trys to claim that this is where they sit every week, because they come every week..bullshit. not once have I seen her, and I am sure it goes the other way around as well..but whatever, we snag three chairs in the corner by the stage and we are set..

as people start to pile in, the douche rocket guys come and try to steal the front row where the purses are..and one guy accidentaly knocks over a table with the girls drinks on it..then words were exchanged and it was madness....admist all that I noticed one of the girls yelling was RockMyWorldRachel, we spoke briefly, but it was nice to see her again..she is actually starting to work Monday nights again, so next week when I go in, she will serve me...

anyways, three comedians, mediocre comedy, the last guy being old school and doing one liners - the first guy new to the scene and was very nervous to get going..all in all it was a night. Afterwards Darrell went over to Yogi's to meet up with his friends while TJ and myself went back to my place...we sat around for a bit just watching TV, then as it always happens, the futon played it's magical roll and made us sleepy...so TJ went about his way home and I got ready for bed, made an hour long phone call and passed out..













"You got time to lean, you got time to fuck off and die"

Last Days..
and tears at work..

An overly emotional day for a lot of reasons...

I don't know how I did it, but not only did I make it through the day, I was on time and nobody died. After getting only three hours of sleep from what became an even more fucked up night/morning I was back at it, working it OG style. I made a quick stop at Wal-Mart to pick up the pictures I dropped off before I left for Cedar Point and then jumped over to the Garden. I worked the morning shift in the bar with TJ, it was a good morning, we talked, everyone loved the pictures, I hated all my tables for tipping me 10%, but you know, it happens. Cuts were made and Cassidy and I went over to Subway to have lunch, which was different because I have never actually hung out with Cassidy, other than that one time she and her boyfriend came out to Comedy Caravan, back when people actually showed up..

After my hour break I went back to the OG and that's when all the confusion happened..so last week Amanda asked me if I could pick up her ToGo shift on Sunday night...well I was scheduled to work as a server all day..so she came up with some brilliant scheme that if she were to get my serving shift covered could I take her shift..so I said not a problem, as long as it gets approved by a manager..I mean technically I have never done togo before...so last night she calls me to tell me someone picked up the shift, ok....but the managers are really iffy on this whole thing and one person was going to allow it, the other said probably not..so they took Adam H off the floor and put him on Togo, therefore making him work straight through...I felt absolutely horrible for the whole thing but he said he wasn't mad at me...

so I picked up his section and that was fine, made better money in the night than in the morning, and my last last table knowing heather and our old manager Karl..I sold them two bottles of wine, to two drinking guests, amazing I know - the best part was they had a GSS..but the bad news to the night was a couple tables before the cool one I received my first ever complaint from a guest...

so as my story goes...I had a table of four, they were trashy people but whatever, not until they piss me off do they receive less than par service...so whatever, the food is up and Ian, em effing Ian runs out their food...Ian is one of two head culinary assistants, he's wanting to become a manager, has been to several openings and in fact he just came back from one, so his chefs jacket was full of pins...anyways, he runs out the food..they are talking to him about the pins, I get a pepper mill and come back...now the gentleman at the table is upset, he tells me his chicken alfredo looks like it does when he takes it him and microwaves it, it "has balls" (????) so I offer to get him some alfredo to freshen it up. he wasn't satisfied by that response, and just sat there with a dumb look on his face, then the other people at the table tell me he wants a fresh one, so I saw ok, and as I start to grab for it he makes his noise saying no, I'll just keep it, I know what happens, I'm not giving it to you, just get the alfredo....now I am in shock, but I comply cursing him out in the alley...

So I bring him the alfredo and things seem fine..I check back a few moments later and he pushes the dish at me telling me he is through with it, so I take it away telling him I will bring him a brand new one, he tells me he doesn't want one but I insist on it to make things better, then that's when he cops an attitude and gets loud saying he does not want another one and he wants that one taken off his bill..so I comply and walk away..and even though he has insulted me I make check backs on the table, but no eye contact towards the asshole, and I can tell something is awry in the air because every time I do check back they get shitty with me, and as I pull away from the table they start snickering...

so as I am boxing up their food I overhear them talking about how one of them went here for lunch and got everything comped, and the other got this for free because they weren't greeted fast enough and so forth..and I am standing there thinking, I am right here dumbasses, I will put this fork through your fucking eyes....

so I drop the check off, and do my standard routine, check back and the book hasn't been touched..I wait and wait, the book finally opens, but no money is inside, then after a bit there is, and when I check on them they tell me they are still talking, so I leave it...minutes pass and I am sat with a six top. So as I am going through with my greet and wine presentations I noticed the asshole get up and storm past me, all I can think is, oh, I bet they are ready to pay now...five minutes later I see randy got to the table and they get up and leave..so I go to the table to pick up whatever I can I notice the receipt, everything was comped...on a fifty dollar meal, the entire bill was now zip..not only that but they left me three dollars...

well I tried to get to randy to figure out what happened but he peaced out right after that, I was more outraged at the fact they complained than the tip, believe me...later I got together with matt who explained what the table told randy, and I was furious. in all my time serving I have never received a complaint from a table, if anything it's the exact opposite, people telling me how I've been the best server they have ever had....well, there was that one time my stalker emailed a ficticious and malicious complaint against me in my closing days at RR to get me fired before I moved to Bloomington, or the one time a group of on break employees sat behind a table I was serving and using unprofessional language, I got in trouble for that...but me personally...no..bullshit....

So as I am wrapping up my evening I notice April gathering her things, looking like she is getting ready to leave. so I approach her and tell her she can't leave without saying goodbye to me, where she replies with she wasn't leaving just yet, and that was not her intentions..so moments later we find each other in the alley and we begin to say our goodbyes, joking around saying how we'll never see each other again hoping the best for each other, yadda yadda yadda...so we embrace and I turn to walk away saying goodbye to which she comes back with, "have a nice life" - and I naturally start to agree, saying yeah you too, but mid-sentence the weight of that statement hits me..I stand there in utter shock and start to tear up..

now that phrase has been said to me before, but people would just say it, there was always a way of communication, whether be random visits, writing, or calling one another, simply having a cell phone number keeps a hope alive..but this was final, this was it, over and done with. and although we only knew each other for a month or so, not really hanging out or anything, not making an impact on each other's lives, knowing full well that this was it, I'll never see this person again, it is certain..that's what got to me, it's just as if she died.

So after work I went home to change and then made it on over to Upland to grab a drink with a small crew..nothing overly exciting happened, we just all sat around talking about shit that pisses us off, nothing out of the ordinary..and not only did I have a decent time at upland for once, I randomly found a beer I liked, Amber..go figure.

there was supposed to be stuff going on afterwards, but I had made plans with Andrea, she wanted to talk to me about the things that have been bothering her - and for the record I received so much shit for actually caring, or offering to lend an ear for someone...I'll be a martyr in every situation I suppose. so I got home, cooked a pizza and shortly after Andrea came over..she wanted me to put Who Framed Roger Rabbit in as she talked, so I complied....so told me everything and let me just say, intense...I would be in tears as well....I don't remember much, but somehow admist all that I passed out - I would laugh it was while she was talking to me - I did wake up later, somewhere around 4, a little disturbed by the fact I fell asleep not really remembering it, and that Andrea was asleep as well....but I stayed up to put things away, straighten up, and whatever else, I was wide awake..but somehow Andrea stayed asleep through all that and I covered her up on the futon and passed out.











"Have a nice life..."

It's All About Timing...
..and the lasts...


So the day started off kinda annoying, I forgot what it was like to iht the snooze button several times, and on the fifth time there was a knock at the door. the maintenance guys showed up to fix the A/C or something, i don't know, all i remember was trying to shoo a bunny back into the bedroom. I ironed Mindy's shirts while she hopped in the shower, then i made my way home realizing i didn't have much time before work either.

work was lame, i had a bianco section, not that many tables but still walked out with 40 bucks..i tipped out the hosts because there was no busser and they were doing the dirty work. i started becoming more annoyed being there as the day went on..and then when i had to cancel my eye appointment for tonight i got really irrate. i never am scheduled to work monday nights, so when the doctor told me there was a spot available monday night i jumped on it, granted it cuts into margarita time but hey, it happens. Wel they next date they had for me was this thursday, but i'm out of town til sunday...and i don't kno my schedule for next week..and after that i am gone...

so i cursed Pearle Vision for giving me the wrong prescription, i cursed the olive garden for scheduling me on a monday night, and i cursed whomever else crossed my path.

so right after i cancelled the appointment i sent out a mass text to see if anyone wanted my tonight shift, i thought i would give it a shot, ease my anger at that moment - and low and behold only moments later i had Chase willing to pick it up...sso then i called to reschedule the cancelled appointment, and somehow it all worked out.

it was 2 when the splits were cut, and i was out shortly after seeings how i had no tables. Mindy decided to eat food at the Olive Garden and i became more annoyed with people. However she gave me her key to make sure she shut her bedroom door to keep the bunny in there while the maintenance men were working. so on my way home i made the stop, sure enough the door was closed...at times i think she does these little things just to create awkward situations..like me having her apartment key and knowing full well that i am going out tonight...

i got home, changed out of my OG clothes, got directions to the Social Security office and headed for it...well on my way i decided, while driving mind you, to take one last look as to where i think i placed my SS card..and sure enough within seconds i found it, now there was no need for the drive - and it was at that time i noticed a yellow convertible mustang flying past my left side. i took a look at the driver and who else could it be but Cystal K, the ex OG employee who works at Bdubs now and is having a graduation party we are all invited to. Well she was going the same way i was and at the stop sign she saw me in her rear view mirror and got all excited..as waved me to have me pull into the drive she was and i followed. he talked briefly, she told me she is coming into the OG tomorrow to give me a more personal invitiation and we left it at that.

so then it was back home..and everytime i tried to do something i ended up not going through with it, like there was something more important i hadn't done yet, it could wait, or just who knows.