Dance Party Wednesday Continues...
..and so does the pain

so yeah, today is the dance party..I'm post dating this back to be honest, it's really 230am right now..but yeah, it's now tradition for there to be a dance party on Wednesday night, drinking is *optionable*...I skip out on the drinking and just cut myself out from the world, it's tradition now...this party though has been the biggest Wednesday party, they keep getting better.

I played the drums, stopped because I was beating it too hard, or so I thought, bonzo on the drums here. then I switched to guitar, came up with this nice little bass line, it's cute. played with the wah pedal, yeah, fun stuff.

Chris played "600 dollars" for Jim and I at the spork..actually there was a lot of people there, amazing. saw the mandolin player, made me happy and jealous at the same time. Laura Cooper (a name where you have to say the first and last names as if it were one) was there (Neil went ga-ga for her), didn't mention the photography, but invited me to a party in a couple of weeks, whatever...

funny thing, had a masseuse over yesterday and my neck is hurting today, the irony...maybe it's my room, or what I've been eating, in any case it hurts and I can feel the lump of pain....

I had a good walk tonight back home, had a lot of good ideas and things to say, but I forgot them...I hate these days when I get all down on myself and become anti-social...the angry anti-social...maybe it's Wednesdays, maybe it is a precursor of things to come...whatever....

I remembered when you saw my gun, shocked and horrified, ask me to put it away, but then wanted to hold it. I remember those nights, making hot tea for you..it was my little job, I wanted it to be perfect for you...I think you were going to work. I remember you shirtless in the law-away room.
I remember bunches of random things at random times..
I talked with Emily, it was a good talk, well especially the ending, but here are some highlights from the beginning...

chuchubunny: I know, but he still feels threatened by you
Blue35Tuesday: good
chuchubunny: which, I can't really blame him
Blue35Tuesday: fear is one emotion I want all people to have from me *smile*
couple minutes later...
Blue35Tuesday: wow....he's too territorial
chuchubunny: which can be a good thing
chuchubunny: he sounds like the complete opposite of you
Blue35Tuesday: what do you mean?
Blue35Tuesday: I understand that my girl has a life of her own and can go out and be with other people...I have (had) trust (in certain people)
chuchubunny: you just seem like you wouldn't care if the girl you were seeing was hanging out with someone else...like it wouldn't matter
Blue35Tuesday: I've had it happen before..and then she left for him!
Blue35Tuesday: HA!
Blue35Tuesday: take that trust!

yeah, so if you liked that, which I did, I love being told by people their perception of me...it's great. but I suppose at the same time I don't like it when it's way off.

anyways, I would really like to elaborate further on that, but whenever I get on here to type, everything is fleeting, funny how my best thoughts are coming to me in the morning to mid-day, really messing with me, I need to get back on my cycle. well I'll be back, peace out ya'll.